I did a lot of changing to the grammar and phrasing. There were some parts where I added clarifying sentences. The conclusion needs a little bit of conclusion. I made a comment to the side of the conclusion that offers some specific suggestions. Basically, it just needs something that says what the point of the research is, and what it means for future research.&nbsp;<br /><br />I didn't really edit the references. I did change some of the internal citations so that they follow APA style (commas, putting multiple works in alphabetical order). In the references list, I added the &amp; sign to almost all of the entries, before the last author's name. But I did not change the entries themselves.