Hi Laura,<br /><br />I have submitted my manuscript <em>The Spirit Ch</em>aser. In addition to any and all critiquing you do, I wanted to let you know a few of my problem areas:<br /><br />Telling too much instead of showing<br />Bland writing<br />Slow pace<br />Smooth transitions<br />Awkward or unnatural dialogue<br />Bibliography correct<br /><br />My back cover blurb is one of the areas I am most concerned about. It is difficult for me to put in what needs to be there without telling too much. I would really appreciate help with it.<br />In additon, I would appreciate any suggestions to make my writing flow better and sound pretty. I know this is a long manuscript, but I wanted your opinion on where to cut parts out before I ripped it to pieces. Also, I left the chapters unnumbered in case you had better suggestions on where to begin and end chapters. Please be brutal. I am very thick-skinned and I want to submit the best possible book to be published.<br /><br />Thank you,<br /><br />Kathleen<br /><br />Kathleen Montemayor