Here's Chapter 1. I've been very tough in my editing and think there's still more that can be done, but I'd like you to look at it first. Note that I've deleted a majority of the ellipses (there were a couple hundred) and replaced them with commas. Also, I don't like the participle form&nbsp;if it can be avoided, so I removed a lot of -ing endings and restructured the sentences while retaining your voice. Let me know what you think. I'm off to Chapter 2.